Wednesday, March 7, 2012

PYHO: Verbal Diarrhea 2G

Yesterday in Mama G's famous Toddle Along Tuesday, I brought up the traits that I hope the kids got from us, and those I hope they didn't.  One of my not-so-favorable traits is my verbal diarrhea.  I tend to say too much in not exactly the right situations.  I'm not exactly coy.  I spew all my truths onto just about anyone that will listen (hence my blog platform).  I'm never malicious with my verbiage, just honest.  I'm 30+, so although I have a better handle on it than I used to, I am probably not going to change dramatically overnight.  There are just some things about myself that, no matter how much I work on them (like my crappy job picking up the phone to catch up with sorry) I just can't seem to make a radical difference in my personality.  Such is life.
Unfortunately, I think we have a 2nd generation verbal diarrhea situation on our hands.  It's no secret T likes to talk...A LOT (like mommy ::blushes::).  Most of the time, it's cute little sayings, words said incorrectly and humorous lines that only a preschooler could get away with.  Harmless.  Like Mommy, T tends to let his mouth go faster than his brain.  He doesn't mean to hurt anyone, get in trouble, embarrass his parents, he is just honest.
So all this intro brings me to why I'm writing a PYHO post about verbal diarrhea.  Last week, T's daycare director stopped me on my way in to tell me that T told her, "you smell like breast milk today".  ::gasp:: I was thinking in my kid said breast???!!!  Luckily, the director and co director thought it was HILARIOUS, so relaxed a bit.  We deduced she might have had some spit-up on her clothes that day, as she has an 8 month old baby, and T connected that smell to the milk that comes out of mommy.  Needless to say I was a bit embarrassed with his blunt observation. 

If it was just that one time last week, I might have been able to get past it.  It wasn't.

A couple of days later the director stopped me again.  She told me (again...she was laughing) that when T got home on the bus from preschool that he saw a lady dropping off her child at the front desk.  My honest child didn't say "hey" or "have a good day" or any of the usual sweet greetings he says.  Nope.  He said "you have a big belly".  ::die::  The director said to him (in the moment) "we don't say that to people".  His response "Well, she does, though.  Does she have a baby in her belly".  ::dies again::  Did I mention the lady at the front desk heard the entire exchange?!?  Yup.  Thankfully, she laughed it off.  But, we all know even those words from a child still hurt.  The director proceeded to explain that sometimes you need to let your brain catch up to your mouth, and think before you speak.  You don't want to hurt other people's feelings with your words.

When T told me the story himself, I have to admit, I had to turn my head so he couldn't see I was chuckling, half mortified and shocked and half, admittedly, amused (sick, I know).  But inside, I felt horrible for the poor lady he hurt.  I also now struggle with how to explain to T that he can't say those types of things to or about people.  How do you explain to a 4.5 year old that words hurt.  I did my very best in the car that day to explain to him that people come in all shapes and sizes, and we shouldn't judge or poke fun at other's differences.  I gave him some examples, and I think he got the message.  Hopefully.  I guess we shall see. 

I just hope T learns from his mistakes early enough in life.  I worry that I'm not doing a good job putting preventions, consequences and explanations in place.  I just want to be sure he gets the message loud and clear, and at an age-appropriate level. 

When hubs and I started having children, we agreed that our main goal in raising our kids was to be sure we raised them to be kind, polite, and respectful to others.  Am I doing something wrong?  Is this just a normal phase kids go through?  Man, parenting is hard.  ::sigh::
Gotta get back to teaching myself the staff dance for the pep rally this Friday.  Yes folks, I am preparing to completely embarrass myself in front of 1200+ high schoolers.  Fun times.  Happy Hump Day!

Linking up with Shell @ Things I can't say.


  1. LOL Kids really don't have filters that young!

  2. Shoot, I'm still working on developing a filter myself!

  3. HAHAHAA! I have no social filter, neither does Sammy. It can be brutal. I have accidentally asked people if they had a stroke , if it hurt to be fat, or if they looked in the mirror before leaving the house. It just came out. I am getting better about it but's hard. Good luck with it!

  4. Oh the kids things say that make parents want to totally dig themselves into a hole and cover themselves in shame. Foot and mouth syndrome starts so young ... let's hope T outgrows it (or becomes a politician! ha!).

    Thank you for stopping by Where is the ME in Mommy? today and letting me know you are struggling with the same "done?" issue I am!

  5. LOL. I know where T is coming from! My first words were "Shut up baby." I was 14-months-old telling off a kid that was 11-months-old. My parents had no idea I could talk let alone say a complete sentence. The other kid's mom still teases me about it to this day. Needless to say I have never had a filter and am too old to change now. My niece is picking up all my bad habits. Oh well. Filter's off!


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